[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M8GOrc0-Ygg[/youtube]

Oh, how I wish I had been fortunate enough to have a presidential candidate walk into my front yard. And have it taped by the media. And have my named mentioned 20 times during a debate. If it had been me, maybe I could have “secured my dream.”

As it stands, it’s not me — it’s Samuel J. Wurzelbacher, better known as Joe the Plumber. I’d already heard he’d secured an agent in Nashville for a country music career; turns out, that’s not the half of it. Over at SecureOurDream.com, Joe’s not only blogging, but shilling a book that he won’t be writing a word of hasn’t written yet, AND a $14.95 subscription to the Joe the Plumber fan club.

The design is awful (though it’s noted that “SECUREOURDREAM.COM VERSION-2 [why the hyphen?] COMING SOON”), and the blog post too innocuous to really get rabid pro-plumber conservatives on their feet:

Congratulations to Barack Obama. The American electorate has decided that he will be our next president. As I have stated, I will honor and support my president, but there will be no free ride. When President-Elect Obama takes office in January, his term of service to the American people begins. We wish our new president blessings of wisdom and good judgment, and we pray he hearkens to our voice if ever we feel our American Dream is being threatened. It will be a loud voice, so good luck trying to ignore it.

None of the links go anywhere, really, except to “coming soon” or more ads for the book. My friend Adam notes that this is probably about a month too late… who really cares about Joe the Plumber at this point? I do think, however, that he might make a good sitcom star — the straight-laced, hard-luck husband whose wife is always getting into shenanigans and whose friends are always looking to him for advice. He’d definitely be as good as Jeff Foxworthy, right?

Click here to read all about it.

NOTE: All referenced ads are VodPodded at right; the list below is upside-down from the order in the VodPod. Deal with it.

1.) Obama’s wink-and-nod on Palin: Actually, it’s Palin who’s winking and nodding, after a little background on McCain saying he’s not particularly knowledgable on the economy, and that he’ll “rely” on his VP for economic advice. MY TAKE: It’s a very wry, hard-hitting ad, but the fact that people have to read it and not hear it is a big negative. It’s a talkie! Why not use it?

2.) McCain’s dig at the big ad buy: Reminds me of the “Celebrity” ad, but less weird and more potent. It’s always seemed to me that McCain shouldn’t whine about being outspent, but spin it somehow into “look how much money he has to throw around on ads, crowning himself president while you struggle to make ends meet.” He seems to be doing this here, and while I don’t think it’s a game-changer, it certainly can’t hurt. He’s also, on the stump, blaming Obama for delaying the World Series with tonight’s ad (which Fox says isn’t true, they’re just cutting the pregame show) and playing up the “he thinks he’s president already!” angle, which could have an effect on any few rare voters to whom politics is like a football game that you don’t have a vested in (i.e. you vote for the underdog).

3.) Al Franken’s funny ad: The guy is a comedian, right? But he hasn’t followed his Republican ex-govenor Jesse “The Body” Ventura in making a lot of ludicrous ads. This one, however, is kind of funny…

4.) Norm Coleman’s “even Hollywood doesn’t like him” counterpunch: Cliff from Cheers and some other washed-up celebs appear in this ad against Franken. It would be a lot more potent if we’d seen any of these people on something besides re-runs in the last 10 years… but still, in a world of boring political ads, I approve of these messages.

Now, the most absolutely ridiculous ad I’ve seen this election isn’t available anywhere online (if someone finds it, I’ll give you a $5 gift certificate to my favorite coffee shop), but let me paint the picture: Charlene Rabold, a Democrat looking to unseat Republican state Rep. Jim DeCesare here in Bowling Green, has an ad that claims DeCesare is at least OK with, if not downright in favor of, legalizing marijuana. The source: A resolution he voted for, honoring economist Milton Friedman! (Who apparently suggested it would make economic sense to legalize marijuana in order to regulate and tax it.) She was later quoted in my newspaper as “Googling” his name to find this factoid. As a letter to the editor today put it, it should be of more concern that a Democrat who wants to fix the economy would have to Google Milton Friedman! Best of all, it ends with a stoned teenager stumbling out of a smoke-filled van, saying “Thanks, DeCesare doood!!!”

Priceless.

You can try this at home!

Go to Google’s front page, type in the word “is” followed by a space. Give it a second, and it will guess what you’re going to ask it. The result is quite telling… though I’m not sure whether it says “look how many Islamophobes use the Internet” or “Barack H. Obama really hasn’t closed the deal” or “famously liberal Google is secretly worried their capital-gains taxes are going to go way up, and so they’ve rigged the game” or what.

Aside from the four obvious ones, I was a little befuddled… I had to ask a co-worker who Danity Kane is (answer: band Sean “Puff Daddy/P. Diddy/Diddylicious” Combs put together on an MTV reality show), and is Google really where you want to get your health information? (Tip of the hat to Wes at insulinfunk.net for pointing me to this.)

This is worth watching… whoever wrote these scripts is a lot better than whoever writes Leno’s. VODPODDED AT RIGHT IN TWO PARTS. —>>

(P.S.: 11:30 p.m. EDT tonight, McCain makes it up to Letterman by appearing on the show… I hear it’s pretty good.)

“If I were watching Fox News, I wouldn’t vote for me, right? Because the way I’m portrayed 24/7 is as a freak! I am the latte-sipping, New York Times-reading, Volvo-driving, no-gun-owning, effete, politically correct, arrogant liberal. Who wants somebody like that?”

— Barack Obama, to Matt Bai of the New York Times

… or, at least, that’s what Barack ******* Obama wants you to think — ABC reports!

Found on Flickr — A pie we can believe in!

Barack Obama smashed his record.  No sooner did the Illinois Senator set a new bar for mentions of the word “pie” in a single campaign event, than he shattered his own mark. … A mere 2 hours after reaching the magic 13, Obama did better; 15 mentions of the word “pie” in 104 seconds.  … Here we go:

“We decided to stop at a diner because I was hungry  and I decided I wanted some pie (1). Pie (2). That’s what I wanted.”

At which point, as usual, someone in the crowd listening offered some pie of their own.

“You make pie(3)?” Obama asked?  “What kind of pie (4) you make? Sweet potato pie (5)? I like sweet potato pie (6). I’m thinking of having a sweet potato pie (7) here in Philadelphia? Because I’ve heard a lot of people are saying they can make sweet potato pie (8).  I’ll put it up against my mother in laws sweet potato pie (9). Alright, you give up? Nah. You. So anyway they did not have sweet potato pie (10) in South OH. So I had coconut cream pie (11). The governor of OH he had lemon meringue pie (12). So we ordered our pie (13)and I decide that I’m going to take a picture with the wait staff.”

It was at this point that he had matched his record.  Had he stopped here, it certainly would have been impressive…yet not historic.  … Nevertheless, the record was within reach. And Obama continued:

“Just as we were re finished taking the picture and the owner comes out, with our pie (14). So I take my pie (15).”

So, yeah. Just thought you might like to know that.

I thought this was worth sharing.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1aBaX9GPSaQ&eurl=http://vodpod.com/watch/1049884-breaking-news-homer-simpson-tries-to-vote-for-obama[/youtube]

Fresh off the heels of that Maddow piece I posted just below, Camp McCain starts courting the “I invented” vote! And how well it turned out for old Al…

Asked what work John McCain did as Chairman of the Senate Commerce Committee that helped him understand the financial markets, the candidate’s top economic adviser wielded visual evidence: his BlackBerry.

“He did this,” Douglas Holtz-Eakin told reporters this morning, holding up his BlackBerry. “Telecommunications of the United States is a premier innovation in the past 15 years, comes right through the Commerce committee so you’re looking at the miracle John McCain helped create and that’s what he did.” [bold mine-R]

Al Gore, call your office.

(Culled from Jonathan Martin’s blog.)